"I am telling him (Bush) that all the world is threatening you since the general path that the world is taking is towards worshipping god and divinity. This massive stream is moving and you are nothing in comparison to God's will."
Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's rejoinder to American President George Bush's remark that Ahmadinejad was a tyrant, as quoted on ExpressIndia.com, the companion Web site to The Indian Express. I have no comment, considering I like my head attached to my body.

"Why did God do this to me?"
James Polehinke, sole survivor of a plane crash in Lexington, Ky, that left him a quadraplegic, as quoted in the Cincinnati Post.

"It was not God. It was just an accident."
His mother's reported response to the question.

"Here I'd always imagined Jesus was the sweet, cuddly, loving dude, and suddenly I find out he makes Conan the Barbarian look like Conan the wimp. He didn't come with a guitar singing Kum Ba Yah. Jesus brought a sword to the earth, and he is still swinging it."
Actor Stephen Baldwin, another person who has obviously never read the gospels, from his book The Unusual Suspect: My Calling to the New Hardcore Movement of Faith, which details how he found Christ

"I like to ask friends of mine, happy couples who seem to have a pretty good marriage, I will ask them, 'How's your sex life?'...They will say something like pretty good or okay or no complaints here. Here's what I tell them: Imagine taking a healthy sex life and inviting the power of God into that exchange."
Actor Stephen Baldwin, who is definitely into the freakiest threesomes ever, from his book The Unusual Suspect: My Calling to the New Hardcore Movement of Faith, which details how he found Christ