"My god is a god who wants me to have things. He wants me to bling! He wants me to be the hottest thing on the block."
Mary J. Blige, singer and someone who has obviously never read the New Testament, as quoted in Blender magazine

"I said a little prayer before I actually did the fingerprint thing and the picture. My prayer was basically, 'Let people see Christ through me. And let me smile.' "
Tom DeLay, as quoted in Time magazine, explaining why he smiled in his mug shot after being booked on charges of money laundering and conspiracy